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Tag: Mentorship

  • Networking: Stop Networking and Start Making Friends

    Networking: Stop Networking and Start Making Friends

    The word “Networking” makes most people cringe. It conjures images of stuffy conference rooms, name tags, and awkward conversations where you pretend to care about someone’s weekend just so you can hand them a business card.

    It feels transactional. It feels fake. It feels like you are a used car salesman trying to “close a deal.”

    But the thing is: most jobs are never posted online. They are filled via the “Hidden Job Market”, through referrals, internal moves, and word-of-mouth. If you aren’t networking, you are only applying to 20% of the market. And you are competing with 100% of the applicants.

    So, how do you network without feeling dirty? Simple: Stop “Networking.” Start making friends.

    Here is the Anutio guide to building a powerful network by being a human being, not a hunter.

    1. The “Used Car Salesman” Trap

    Why does networking feel gross? Because most people treat it like a transaction.

    • “Hi, nice to meet you. Can you get me a job?”

    This is the professional equivalent of proposing marriage on a first date. It’s too much, too fast. When you approach someone with a “Ask” immediately, their guard goes up. They feel used.

    The Fix: The “Give First” Mentality The best networkers don’t ask “What can I get?” They ask “What can I give?” Even if you are a student, you have value to give:

    • You can share an interesting article relevant to their field.
    • You can offer a fresh “Gen Z” perspective on their marketing.
    • You can simply offer genuine curiosity (which feeds their ego).

    2. The Science of “Weak Ties”

    You might think you need a “Best Friend” inside Google to get hired. Actually, you need an acquaintance.

    In 1973, sociologist Mark Granovetter published a famous study called The Strength of Weak Ties. He found that most people get jobs through “Weak Ties”—people they see rarely or barely know.

    • Strong Ties (Close friends) know the same people you know. They have the same information you have.
    • Weak Ties (Acquaintances) bridge you to new social circles, new information, and new opportunities.

    The Lesson: You don’t need to be best friends. You just need to be on their radar.

    3. The “Beer Test” (or Coffee Test)

    Before you send a LinkedIn DM, run it through the Beer Test.

    • “If I walked up to someone at a bar/cafe and said this, would they walk away?”

    Failed Test (The Robot Approach):

    “Dear Sir/Madam, I am a highly motivated individual seeking synergy with your organization. Kindly review my attached CV.”

    • Result: They walk away. It’s robotic and demanding.

    Passed Test (The Human Approach):

    “Hi Sarah, I saw your post about the new sustainability regulations in Toronto. It totally changed how I view my supply chain projects. Thanks for sharing that.”

    • Result: They smile. You started a conversation, not a pitch.

    4. The 3-Step Ladder: A Script for Introverts

    If you are terrified of reaching out, use this “Slow Escalation” framework. It builds trust over time so you never have to make a “Cold Call.”

    Step 1: The Silent Follow (Days 1-7)

    Find 5 people you admire in your target industry.

    • Follow them on LinkedIn.
    • Do not message them.
    • Just read their content. Learn their voice.

    Step 2: The “Value Add” Comment (Days 8-14)

    When they post something, leave a thoughtful comment.

    • Bad Comment: “Great post!” (Ignore).
    • Good Comment: “This is a great point about AI bias. I noticed the same thing when I was testing ChatGPT for my Class Project. Do you think this will change how we hire in 2026?”
    • Why it works: You proved you are smart. You asked a question (which boosts their engagement).

    Step 3: The “Warm Ask” (Day 15+)

    Now that they recognize your face from the comments, send the DM. The Script:

    “Hi [Name], I’ve been following your posts on [Topic] for a while—specifically your take on [X].

    I’m currently transitioning from [Teaching] to [Corporate Training] and I’m trying to understand the biggest gaps in the industry right now.

    Would you be open to a 15-minute virtual coffee? I don’t need a referral—just your perspective. If you’re too busy, I totally understand.”

    Why this wins:

    1. Flattery: You proved you read their work.
    2. Low Friction: “15 minutes.” “Virtual.”
    3. Safety: “I don’t need a referral.” (This lowers their defenses immediately).

    5. How to Conduct the “Informational Interview”

    Congratulations. They said yes to coffee. Do not ask for a job. If you ask for a job, they become a “Gatekeeper.” If you ask for advice, they become a “Mentor.”

    Ask these 3 Questions:

    1. “What is the one thing you wish you knew before you started in this role?”
    2. “I’m planning to learn [Skill X]. Is that actually used in the day-to-day work here, or should I focus on [Skill Y]?” (This shows you are strategic).
    3. “Who else should I talk to?” (This turns one connection into two).

    By the end of the call, they will usually ask you: “So, are you looking for a role? Send me your resume.” That is the victory.

    Build the Well Before You Are Thirsty

    The worst time to network is when you are desperate for a job. Desperation smells like fear. The best time to network is now, when you don’t need anything.

    Start making friends. Start being curious. In the modern economy, your “Net Worth” really is your “Network.” But only if you treat people like humans, not rungs on a ladder.

    Ready to upgrade your professional brand? Make sure your LinkedIn profile matches your new networking strategy. Read our guide on Why Every Student Needs a Digital Profile.

  • Questioning and Listening Skills in Career Advising: From “Fixer” to “Guide”

    Questioning and Listening Skills in Career Advising: From “Fixer” to “Guide”

    As a career advisor or school counselor, your day is a barrage of panic.

    • “I don’t know what to major in.”
    • “My parents want me to be a doctor, but I hate blood.”
    • “Am I going to be unemployed forever?”

    Your instinct is to Fix It. You want to pull out a brochure, point to a job, and say, “Do this. It pays well. Problem solved.”

    This is called the “Righting Reflex”—the urge to set things right. But in career advising, “fixing” the problem is often a mistake. If you tell a student what to do, they might do it—but they won’t own it. And when it gets hard, they will quit (or blame you).

    The goal of advising isn’t to be the Expert with the Map. It is to be the Guide with the Flashlight. You don’t determine the destination; you just help them see the path.

    Here are 5 advanced questioning and listening techniques to transform your advising sessions.

    1. The “Open-Ended” Audit

    Most conversations die because of “Closed Questions”—questions that can be answered with a “Yes” or “No.”

    • Advisor: “Do you like Math?”
    • Student: “No.”
    • Advisor: “Okay… do you like English?”
    • Student: “I guess.”

    This is an interrogation, not a conversation. To unlock a student’s true interests (the Saturday Morning Test), you must switch to Open-Ended Questions.

    The Cheat Sheet:

    • Don’t Ask: “Do you want to be an Engineer?”
    • Ask: “What is it about Engineering that caught your attention?”
    • Don’t Ask: “Are you worried about money?”
    • Ask: “What role does salary play in your decision-making process?”
    • Don’t Ask: “Did you like your internship?”
    • Ask: “Tell me about a day at your internship where time flew by. What were you doing?”

    2. The Power of “Reflective Listening” (Mirroring)

    Students often don’t know what they think until they hear themselves say it. Your job is to be a mirror. When a student dumps a chaotic mix of emotions on you, don’t offer a solution. Just reflect it back.

    The Technique:

    • Student: “I don’t know, I just feel like everyone is getting ahead of me and I’m stuck, and my dad keeps asking about law school but I want to do something creative but creative jobs don’t pay.”
    • Advisor (The Mirror): “It sounds like you feel paralyzed by the pressure to choose between financial safety and your actual interests.”

    Why it works: The student hears their own chaos organized into a clear sentence. Usually, they will sigh with relief and say, “Exactly.” Now that the problem is defined, they can start solving it.

    3. The “Scaling Question” (For the Indecisive)

    When a student is stuck between two choices (e.g., Double Majors vs. Starting a Business), they often spiral. Use the 1-to-10 Scale to force a decision.

    The Script:

    • Advisor: “On a scale of 1 to 10, how confident do you feel about majoring in Psychology?”
    • Student: “Maybe a 6.”
    • Advisor: “Okay. Why is it a 6 and not a 4?“

    The Psychology: By asking “Why isn’t it lower?”, you force them to defend the positive reasons.

    • Student: “Well, it’s not a 4 because I really love understanding how people think.” Suddenly, they are selling themselves on the idea.

    4. The “Miracle Question” (For the Hopeless)

    Some students are so bogged down by GPA stress or family expectations that they can’t dream. Remove the barriers with a hypothetical.

    The Script:

    “Suppose you go to sleep tonight and a miracle happens. You wake up five years from now, and your career life is perfect. You are happy. You are paid well. What are you doing when you wake up on that Tuesday morning?”

    Watch their face. Do they say they are in a high-rise office in a suit? Or are they in a forest tagging wildlife? This bypasses the “logical” brain and accesses the “aspirational” brain.

    5. Embrace the “7-Second Silence”

    This is the hardest skill to learn. When you ask a deep question, the student will fall silent. Your instinct will be to fill the silence because it feels awkward. Don’t.

    That silence is where the thinking happens. If you interrupt the silence, you interrupt the insight. Count to 7 in your head. 1… 2… 3… Usually, around second 5, the student will blurt out the real truth: “I think I’m just scared of failing.” That is the breakthrough. You only get it if you wait for it.

    You Are Not the Savior

    The best career advisors are lazy, in a strategic way. They don’t do the work for the student. They ask the questions that make the student do the work.

    By using Open-Ended Questions, Reflections, and Silence, you stop being a “Fixer” and start being a “Catalyst.” You aren’t giving them a fish. You are teaching them that they already know how to catch one.

    Want to give your students better tools to answer these questions? Use the Anutio Career Platform to let students self-assess their skills and interests before they walk into your office.